How Can I Convince My Wife To Try Swinging?

Rosie Kay aka ThisKindaGirl
4 min readOct 3, 2020


Dear thiskindagirl How Can I Convince My Wife To Try Swinging? It’s a question that I get asked rather frequently, and one that many people are searching for. You want to explore the lifestyle with your partner, but you're not sure how to talk to them about it. The thought of trying to convince them it's a journey for the both of you to go on together fills you with worry. What if they reject the idea? And reject you in the process? Dont worry, I am here to answer all your questions on how can I convince my wife to start swinging- My Top Tips.

I need to stress that there’s no guarantee your partner is going to want to try swinging. You can’t convince anyone to do anything they dont want to do. They have to draw their own conclusions as to what they would and would not like to try. Just because you want to try it, it doesn’t mean they want to try it. The best thing you can do is be honest and open about how you want to explore the lifestyle with them.

You cant coerce or pressure anyone into swinging, sex or any form of intimacy. If they dont want to try it, then respect their wishes.

How can I Convince My Wife To Start Swinging?- My Top Tips

  • Explain that you want to share the swinging experience with her and that you can't imagine doing it with anyone else. You want to experience and enjoy the lifestyle together, and grow as a couple.
  • Listen to her reservations and fears. Understandably, she’s going to have concerns about starting swinging, listen to them and find a solution together. If one partner thinks swinging will ruin the relationship, ask them why? Then address these reasons, are they founded in anything specific.
  • Remind your partner that they are loved and adored regardless of being involved in the swinger lifestyle.
  • Make sure you enter the lifestyle for the right reasons if you would love to see your wife having sex with another woman but shes, not in the slightest bit Bi-curious, then im afraid no amount of pestering is going to make her change her mind.
  • You have to be prepared to compromise and work together. Chances are the person who initiated the swinging feels more confident that the person who didn’t. Taking things slowly is key; always move at the pace of the least experienced person.
  • Read blogs and other peoples experiences of swinging together, to get a realistic idea of what the lifestyle is all about. There was a time, many years ago, I didn’t think I’d ever have been able to swing with another couple…oh how times change!
  • If your partner really doesn’t get it, I’m afraid there’s not an awful lot you can do to convince them. If they reject you and brandish you a pervert, ( which sadly does happen) this can hurt. You have to understand that they are probably doing this if they are feeling unhappy about what you have suggested. After all, the natural response to something we dont understand and feel threatened by is to be cynical about it. Feeling threatened by the prospect of introducing others into your most intimate relationship is perfectly normal.
  • If your partner is not warming to the idea of opening up your relationship, then you can always suggest other ways in which you can enjoy different types of sex together. If having an active and experimental sex life is important to you then dont be afraid to voice your opinions and desires. Your desires are personal to you, and if you want to experiment sexually, then you should be able to. Sometimes you have to compromise within a relationship, but that doesn’t mean not persuing what turns you on for fear of upsetting others. If you want to experience anal sex whilst performing oral on your woman, for example, but your partner isn’t keen on getting another man involved, then investing in a good quality dildo can be a solution.
  • Reconnecting after swinging is a crucial step and one that many couples dont consider before starting swinging. Reconnecting is vital for strengthening bonds. Sharing your afterthoughts allows you to discuss, explore and acknowledge your desires in a safe and nurturing environment. When you reconnect with your partner, you discuss what you enjoyed, and didn’t enjoy. What emotions arose and how whatever you participated in made you feel. Only you and your partner share this reconnecting, which in turn draws you closer together. You only have to look at strong swinger couples to see how in love they are! The connection and understanding you create could never be replaced by someone who isn’t in the lifestyle. It simply wouldn’t work.

How Can I Get My Wife To Swing?

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Rosie Kay aka ThisKindaGirl

💕Swinger Lifestyle Expert 💯Open Relationship Coach 🗝️Unlock The Lifestyle With Me 👇🏻Use the link to start your journey